Inclined Chronicles of Indulgence

Google search Last night I pulled out the King James version of Bible from the shelf and put it on my bedside table. I was not in a very good state of mind. I did not do so because I was afraid to be shunted to hell if I killed myself. If God was merciful he wouldn't inflict the curse of depression. May be he is mythical. I don't exactly also disbelieve in God's existence. It is just that an entity with such powers will have to franchise responsibilities to others. Back to the Bible. Being a long-term (if two years count as long) depression patient, I have found that I need an anchor outside my head to hold on to life. Often it is my dog whose unconditional love keeps sticking to this painful side of life. I have been keeping away from her lately. I am afraid she will contract depression. And that is something no mother will ever want for her child.  I keep diverting from the Bible. If it cannot hold my attention when I am blogging about it, then I doubt how much ...

WARNING: If you are happy with your life, do not read any further.  That being said, let me tell you how harmless depression is. It is a blown up amalgamation of anxiety, sadness, fear, and trauma. It does not have a real identity. May be that should explain why it attacks your self-esteem and renders you with an identity crisis. But you see, depression itself isn't bad. Consider it as a spoilt child of an obnoxiously rich family.  When depression befriends you, it makes you unconditionally attached to darkness and isolation. You will always find yourself better off without people. Any interactive move not made by you will cause you annoyance and irritation for any random reason. It is not always without cause, though. Gradually, at a really fast pace, you learn to live by yourself, keeping a distance from everybody possible. Well, the alter ego which, if decides to fight against depressed mind, will give in to isolation but will make you long for close company...